For months now I have been praying for my friend Ann. Ann and her husband have been married for almost five years, and have not yet been able to have a child. Now, while Philip and I were ready for another baby, I wasn't praying for me to become pregnant, but for her. Having known the pain of wanting a baby, and not being able to have one, I did not want Ann to continue to suffer that. So I was praying my heart out, that she would be blessed with the opportunity to be a mother. Then I found out I was pregnant. When I told Ann I was pregnant, I found out that she too was pregnant and due around the same time I am. (There are at least 4 ladies in my ward due in June, that I know of.) Instantly my prayers changed to "please Heavenly Father, let Ann keep her baby. If one of us has to loose our babies, let it be me. I already have one perfect little boy, and Ann deserves this. So please, let her keep her baby." For a while I felt like an awful mother. I would be devastated if I lost this baby, but the thought of Ann feeling that devastation hurt so much.
I think I have a very small understanding now of the love Christ has for us. Did he want to suffer and die for us, I don't think the thought was appealing. But, the thought of us not making it back to live with Him, was even harder. So He suffered so that we could be happy. I am so grateful for the sacrifices He has made for me and my family. I am also so grateful that through praying and loving my friend, I was given a tiny bit of understanding of that which our Savior did for us.
For those of you who didn't know, I am pregnant with baby number two! I am due in June, and Philip and I are very excited to have a new little one join our family.
5 hours ago